Well it’s been a long time coming, but at last I can reveal the BEAUTIFUL RAIN.
Hope you enjoy. If you do, please pass it on to others (and click the Share buttons below).
Tears add to the rain. Happiness makes the sun shine.
DEAD RAT
A little while ago my next door neighbour called to the door and asked if he could take some snips from flowers in our garden. I said of course, work away.
Long story, shortened: The previous owners of our house planted hundreds of flowers and plants all over the place. During the past 9 years of our tenure the garden has been forced to stand on its own two feet and fend for itself for the main part. If I’ve done nothing else, I like to think I’ve taught it some independence. Deirdre next door does some flower arranging every now & again. Her husband Con helps her gather what’s needed.
So Con went off and allowed me return to Series 1 of Damages (which incidentally is both awfully compelling and often just awful -a trend I’ve noticed in other TV shows such as The Tudors -it’s like they know they could be great, but are afraid to commit to being really great in case they lose the mass appeal. So every now & again they liberally apply Dumbdown (TM) and sprinkle it with an over-supply of Obviousness and pop it back in for a few minutes of crispy Crassness -a little something to please everyone, which results in nobody being happy with the end product.)
Glenn Close was being nasty and was about to make a nasty phonecall to another nasty lawyer when Con tapped on the window once again. It turned out he had made a discovery which can be summed up in two words: Dead Rat.
Yuck.
Delayed Rain
Apologies to those of you who have contacted me (or not), wondering about the new video + song, but due to events beyond our control it now won’t be out until Friday the 20th of March (2009) at the earliest.
Beautiful Rain
Yesterday John Poland and I (with the help of other invaluable souls) shot another video. Our third. This one is called Beautiful Rain.
As you can imagine with a title like that, the video involved some rain. It was a tough shoot. Not very much went according to our simple plans. On paper it was very straightforward: There are just two verses in this song, with a small instrumental bit in between.
The idea for the video was this:
1. We see rain.
2. JP sings the first verse while standing in the rain.
3. Gorilla sees JP, casts off his umbrella and begins dancing in the rain.
4. JP sings the 2nd verse while standing in the rain, turning in circles.
That, more or less was the plan. We even had a little actual rain, which was nice. But we knew we would need a little more rain no matter what, so we were prepared with a hose with suitable sprinkler attachment.
We did some practice takes, with rainwear, but only when JP removed his protective clothing and began singing under the falldown did it become apparent that it was too damn cold!
Unfortunately, in the spot we were filming we were unable to run some hot water through a hose, otherwise it probably might have been doable. But within a minute-or-so it was obvious this idea would have to be scrapped.
Take a look at a wet JP:
“SMILE JOHN!”
“SING THE WORDS JOHN!”
“LOOK UP INTO THE RAIN JOHN!”
“DON’T RAISE YOUR HAND!” “OPEN YOUR EYES!” “SMILE!”
“KEEP FACING FORWARD! SMILE! SMILE YA BASTARD! SMILE INTO THE BEAUTIFUL RAIN!!”
.
As you can imagine, I didn’t have it easy. Nothing I did or said could make it possible for JP to do it.
Anyway, initially we thought the day was a washout if you pardon the pun, but after thinking about it some more we came up with other ways of doing things. We made some compromises and added some alternative shots. That’s what happens with filming all the time, no doubt.
The important thing is WE WERE NOT BEATEN! We got the shots we needed -well almost all. We just need a teensy bit more -but we’re waiting for the right time to shoot.
Fear not -you will see the final video on here first, so keep checking back throughout the week to see how it looks. And did I mention the song is very nice indeed? Wait til you hear it -another great tune for our forthcoming Happiness Album !
Which cup is you?
I’ve been thinking of cups. Well someone has to.
For the purpose of this discussion (and I hope you jump in) I will keep it down to just two types of cup: Those that are attractive to The Male and to The Female.
My first example is the shape most commonly found in every house that I’ve been to…
Victim o’ the wood
There is something sinister about a lone man in a wood don’t you think? No companion, no dog, no jogging outfit -just a man alone, walking perhaps. In a wood.
I mean, a woman would obviously be nuts to go walking alone in a dark wooded area, but only for her lack of fear. Who knows what danger lurks around the nearest tree? I’m not justifying the fear, simply pointing out that it is logical (or at least human) even if irrational, to think it. And it’s likewise irrational not to.
But a man alone in a wood is most certainly a psycho killer. He is on his way back from dumping the body and now you are a witness and now he is going to kill you. Nobody else is within sight or earshot. The path is bringing you closer to him. There is no way you can escape without highlighting your fear. You know your fear is irrational. You know it is nuts to run away. You are forced to pass him on the narrow path, placing yourself within easy reach of his murderous hands. Will you be the fool or the victim?
A short while ago I was that man -the psycho killer in the wood I mean. I confess I didn’t murder anyone, but I might as well have had.
More Monkey Business
Once again John Poland scours the deepest recesses of the mind and comes to grips with the primitive thoughts within. It’s not always glum in there y’know!
Be sure to keep watching to the end!
Simply Happy Ringtone!
I know what you’re thinking -“How could I possibly afford a Simply Happy Ringtone!?”
But fret not, because not only is this ringtone very cheap, it is in fact FREE!
You’ve watched the video, below, and sung along on the second listen and you found you couldn’t get the tune out of your head.
Now, take this mp3 ringtone (rightclick/Save-As) and do the same to your friends and enemies. Go forth and infest them with the upbeat positivity of your incoming phonecalls!
(Above ringtone contains the first Simply Happy chorus, followed by the more frenetic final chorus if you haven’t answered by then. If you’d prefer just the final chorus you can download it here.)
Spread the Happiness -Prepare to be hated!
EMERGENCY WHIP-AROUND!
I urge you to heed what I’m saying. This is serious people. The world is on the brink and we all need to row together and prop each other up where we can.
That is why I am leading a campaign for an informal whip-around for one very special person. I’m sure you have a leaky tap you were looking to replace this year or were intending to buy a steak or some lamb chops this month or maybe you felt flathulach and thought you might splash out on a new pair of shoes (?)
But before you spend those coppers in your pocket, please please please spare a thought for the chairman of the Bank of Ireland, Mr. Brian Goggin, who I just heard on the radio. He expects to earn under 2 million euros this year.
Surely we can’t let this happen to a man who took home more than 2.9 million last year. I mean, that’s a 33% paycut!!
So, if any of you are rich on redundancy or were suddenly paid part of an invoice due to you two years ago, perhaps you could mosey on over to your nearest Bank of Ireland branch (if it hasn’t been closed during the streamlined Celtic Tiger years) and put a little something in an envelope for Mr. Goggin. You can trust Bank of Ireland to know what to do with it.
Give a little now. It will help a lot.
(They’ll be back for the rest later on.)
If I ruled the world…
If I ruled the world I would enforce a “Gorilla Wednesday” law whereby everybody would have to go to/from their place of work wearing a gorilla suit on Wednesdays.
Just think how much better off the world would be if everyone had to wear a gorilla suit on Wednesdays
-and at no extra cost!!!
